Darrick Robles Nightmares are quite common in children between the ages of 3 and 6. The corona pandemic may have exacerbated the problem in many families. For any parent unsure of what to do and how to help their child, Med-Healths Child Psychologist Martin Forster has a variety of tips.
Corona-related nightmares
The longer the Corona crisis lasts, the greater its impact on our mental health. And children are affected too. The extensive restrictions of the global lockdowns have turned the lives of many children upside down. Just like adults, they experience emotions such as fear, worry and sadness. Nightmares can arise from this as a possible physical symptom.
In contrast to adults, however, smaller children in particular do not yet have the language skills to express their feelings. This can lead to more nightmares. The good news is that parents and carers can do a number of things to help.
Why do children have nightmares?
Nightmares are particularly common in children between the ages of 3 and 6. Most children eventually grow out of this stage. Like dreams, nightmares occur at a stage of the sleep cycle that is characterized by rapid eye movements. During this phase, called REM sleep, the brain is particularly active. The first REM phase occurs about 90 minutes after falling asleep, with cycles getting longer and longer throughout the night.
“Like dreams, nightmares are often a way to process the events and emotions we face in everyday life,” explains Martin Forster, Med-Healths’s child psychologist. “For example, if the child For example, if you got upset, traumatized, or worried about anything during the day, it can later manifest as a nightmare.”
Nightmare or night terrors?
Nightmares are often confused with night terrors. However, these are 2 completely different phenomena. Night terrors are common in children aged 3 to 8 years. It occurs during deep sleep when the body is relaxed and we don’t normally dream.
A child suffering from night terrors may scream, yell, and thrash about in a panic. However, it is unaware of this because it is asleep while doing so. “It’s a bit like sleepwalking. The child may appear disturbed, but will not remember what happened the next morning,” says Forster.
“It’s better not to wake a child with acute night terrors, because that would make them scared when they wake up,” the expert recommends. “If the child is out of bed during a night terrors attack, parents should simply gently guide them back into bed. A nightmare, on the other hand, is something completely different, as the strong emotions inevitably lead to the child waking up, usually full of fear and panic.”
How should parents react to nightmares?
“If the child wakes up with a nightmare, parents should comfort them and make them feel safe and secure,” explains Forster. “You should reassure the child that dreams are not real – that’s important. However, parents should not dwell on the content of the dream. It’s about calming the child down.”
The expert explains: “If the child seems very scared, there is nothing wrong with taking them to the parents’ bed. If a child has recurring nightmares, this may be the best solution for a few days. Some parents worry that this will quickly become a habit that will be difficult to break. However, once the child’s sleep has returned to normal, they can usually go back to sleeping in their own room without any problems.”
Are nightmares normal in children?
“It’s normal for kids to have the occasional nightmare, and it’s usually nothing to worry about,” says Forster. “However, if the child suffers from nightmares on a regular basis, parents should investigate the matter. Is there anything that is stressing or worrying the child? This isn’t always the case, but there may be issues that need to be addressed, perhaps at school or among friends.”
“If a child often wakes up at night because of anxiety, their sleep is disturbed and they feel tired the next day. Or it could be that after a while the child starts to fear going to sleep. Then bedtime suddenly becomes a problem ,” Forster elaborates.
What can trigger nightmares?
“Maybe it’s a one-off event, like after the kid saw a scary movie,” says Forster. “Or maybe a friend did something that upset the child. Or maybe someone close to the child has been ill, or they are concerned that something bad might happen to a parent or sibling.”
“Some children are very sensitive and they may pick up on family concerns. In most cases, the nightmares go away on their own. Sometimes there is no particular reason. Some children just naturally dream more than others and are more likely to have nightmares.”
When should the child be presented to an expert?
“If a child is still having nightmares several times a week after a month, parents should ask the doctor for a referral to a child psychologist,” says Forster. “This can help parents identify more complex issues at play, such as issues within the family that are frightening for the child.”
What can parents do?
“To make younger children feel safe before they go to bed, parents should reassure them that they are protected,” says Forster. If the child has a favorite teddy bear, parents could e.g. For example, say “Teddy is always there to protect you. He takes care of you and nothing bad can happen to you.”
When a child keeps waking up during the night, parents can help them reprogram what’s happening in their nightmare. To achieve this, parents should talk to the child about or record together what is happening during the nightmare. Then they should ask the child to think of a new ending.
“For example, parents could B. ask them to imagine what would happen if Superman suddenly flew in to catch the bad guys. In this way, parents help the child to invent a new story that has a happy ending,” says Forster. The more parents talk about it with the child or draw the plot together, the more this new ending solidifies in their minds, until finally the dream itself changes.”
How can parents help deal with issues such as grief and death?
Due to the Corona crisis, we all think more about illness and death, and even the little ones are affected. Some children may even have lost a loved one to Covid-19. “If their child has many questions and worries about illness and death, parents should not ignore that. It’s much healthier to address the child’s fears,” says Forster.
“Unfortunately, illness and death are part of our lives. By talking to the child about it, parents can help them cope better. If, for example, a relative has died, children should be included in the processes and rituals instead of keeping the whole thing a secret,” explains Forster. “Parents who support their child in dealing with difficult emotions, such as sadness and heartache, help them cope better.”
Can parents save children from nightmares?
“Images can be powerful, and children react more strongly to what they see than to what they hear,” explains Forster. “So if the child is prone to nightmares, parents should make sure that they are not exposed to news or films with disturbing images. For example, when children see images of people in hospital because of the pandemic, it can increase their anxiety and concern that the people they love might get sick. So parents should try to protect their children from images and programs that may upset them.”
